The Best Way To Restart Your Libido After 50: Great Sex After 50 Part 5
This is the fifth (and last) in a series of articles I’m doing on great sex after 50.
Watch the rest of the videos in this series
Great Sex After 50 Part 2: How to boost estrogen naturally with diet, lifestyle, and supplements before, during, and after (yes after) menopause - to save your sex life from menopause dryness
Great Sex After 50 Part 4: Guest expert Clinical Sexologist & Intimacy Coach Jane Steckbeck joins me and shares her best tips, strategies, & tools on vaginal dryness, incontinence, pain with intercourse, and much more.
Great Sex After 50 Part 5: Where did your libido go and how to get it back, a Tonic Herbalists perspective & tips.
In today’s video & blog we’re talking about libido. Where it may have gone - and how to GET IT BACK.
Make sure you didn't miss anything big...
2:51 the most common energy leaks
4:24 how to refill the energy bucket
5:16 recipes that boost your libido
7:15 herbs that specifically restore energy reserves
7:35 understanding the Yin and Yang to help you move your energy
Links Mentioned in the Video
The Menopausal Woman's Roadmap is no longer available, but I have some NEW free cheatsheet downloads that will get you started comprehensively balancing your hormones naturally.
Guide: Use Smoothies to Manage Menopause Without Drugs
FINALLY GET THE ANSWERS YOU'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR
The Menopause Blueprint Masterclass
As an Acupuncturist & Herbalist specializing in women’s health, I talk I talk to women all the time who are suffering from low libido during perimenopause, menopause, and after menopause
And the minute I hear that I turn full on into my Tonic Herbalist self - because this is something that is a beloved topic of the tonic herbalists.
So let me introduce you to the Chinese Medicine and..
The Tonic Herbalist’s View of Your Libido:
Big picture - your sexual energy is really important in Chinese Medicine - but well - it’s not as important as breathing or digesting your food
So if you’ve been:
- Burning the candle at both end
- Feeling depleted, run down, uninspired or suddenly OLD…
Your energy reserves are LOW. There’s hardly enough energy for necessary daily tasks (like breathing) and one of the first things NOT to get done is send energy to your libido.
Step 1 In Restoring Your Libido
Protect Your Energy Reserves By Sealing Energy Leaks
- Seal energy leaks like stress, inflammation, chronic infection, and an unhealthy lifestyle (details are in the video)
Your libido after 50 - where it's gone and how to get it back. A Tonic Herbalist's Plan (now on the blog)
Step 2 In Restoring Your Libido
Replenish Your Energy Reserves With The Basics - Food & Air
- Diet - eating the right nourishing foods daily and keep your digestive system healthy
- Practice deep breathing every day
These are the two main sources of energy in Chinese Medicine - food and air.
Replenish Your Energy Reserves Faster With Superfoods & Libido-Enhancing Recipes
- Recipes that boost libido contain pungent spicy foods like garlic, onions, chives.
- Arginine rich foods like eggs and meat plus nuts and seeds.
- Shellfish like oysters, clams, mussels shrimp and scallops are rich in zinc
- And my favorite superfood for female hormones - fresh ground flax seeds.
- Oats can help free bound up testosterone raising your active testosterone levels, which is great for libido.
- Daikon radish -stimulating a waning libido in men and women.
These are all things everyone can do at home!! The right foods - the right superfoods - and the right lifestyle.
But if you still need more help consider herbs - here how they work.
Step #3 In Restoring Your Libido - Herbs
- There are herbs specifically to restore your energy reserves. These are what are called - JING - or essence or kidney tonics in Chinese Herbalism.
- And if herbs were an easy, one size fits all thing I would absolutely tell you right here and now which ones to use.
But it doesn’t work that way.
The First Reason You Want Customized Herbs:
You can get herbs that strengthen your Yin - cool, watery essence - or your Yang - your warm fiery essence.
You really want to have equal amounts of both Yin and Yang. So some women might have plenty of yang but not enough yin - they want to take 80% Yin essence tonics and just 20% Yang tonics!
And other women might have lots of Yin but not enough Yang - and they want to take 80% Yang essence tonics and 20% Yin essence tonics.
And women who have even amounts of Yin and Yang but need more of bothy can take a 50/50 blend.
The Second Reason You Want Customized Herbs:
As you start quickly adding more energy into your system, it’s important that your energy is circulating freely - really moving well!
Because if your energy is stuck somewhere - when you add a lot more energy - you can get a big energy traffic jam at the place where its stuck.
i always say you want to build your energy - move your energy - build move build move - in steps - until you reach a certain critical level where your energy is so strong that it’s going to move on its own and overcome blockages!
A good herbalist will make sure to mix in herbs to help move your energy as it gets stronger if this is an issue for you.
Bottom line - Herbs are seriously powerful medicine - and you’ll get the best results by far using them when they’re customized for you.
Step 1 in restoring your libido is sealing energy leaks. Find out how now - on the blog!
- Seal energy leaks
- Refill your energy bucket with deep breathing, the right foods, & superfoods
- Add tonic herbs if necessary
Sometimes you'd rather read than watch - I get it!
The Best Way To Restore Your Libido After 50 - Transcript
This video is the fifth and final video in a series I’m doing on having a great sex life during & after menopause.
Today we’re talking about your LIBIDO - where its gone and how to get it back! So stick around!
Hi I’m Dana LaVoie - an Acupuncturist & Herbalist, and The Founder of Menopause Basics. And I talk to women all the time who are suffering from low libido during peri-menopause, menopause, and after menopause.
And the minute I hear that I turn full on into my Tonic Herbalist self - because this is something that is a beloved topic of tonic herbalists.
So let me introduce you to the Chinese medicine view of libido and sexual tonics.
Big picture - your sexual energy is really important in Chinese medicine - but well - it’s not as important as breathing or digesting your food or breathing or a couple of other things, like that.
So if you’ve been burning the candle at both ends and you’re feeling really depleted, run down, uninspired, and just kind of suddenly OLD or tired - your energy reserves are LOW. There’s not enough energy for the tasks your body wants to do every day - and one of the first things that doesn’t get done - is sending energy to your libido.
So STEP ONE is to replenish your energy and refill your energy reserves. (we’ll talk in a minute about exactly how to do this)
STEP TWO is to pay attention specifically to your yin (water) and yang (fire) energy and make sure they’re both being replenished in the proper proportions - because they’re both needed for healthy sexuality.
The Yang (fire energy) is the spark/desire the other, the Yin is the sexual fluids/lubrication and strength of your orgasm.
And as a bonus - everything you do to replenish your YIN and YANG for your sexual energy will have overall anti-aging effects:)
So STEP ONE - replenish your energy reserves. It’s like you have an energy bucket that is empty. You need to refill that bucket.
But if the bucket has a big hole in the bottom - anything you put into it leaks right out - and you never can fill it up.
So the first step is to plug the hole in the bucket to fix the places where your body is leaking energy. This is a bit easier said than done and can mean changing some chronic bad habits - but hey - getting your libido back is a good motivator!! ...
The most common energy leaks are:
Stress - STRESS is a fact of life - so yes it’s time to get real about stress management, reducing stress in your life if you can - and the biggest tonic herbalist secret here is using adaptogenic herbs to help you handle stress better.
Another common energy leak is INFLAMMATION or chronic infection - so anytime your immune system is working when it should be resting- anything from allergies to inflammation to toenail fungus or any low grade infection - figure out what it’s going to take to get those taken care of. Again - adaptogenic herbs can help with this.
Another common energy leak is an UNHEALTHY lifestyle - so to fix that - a regular bedtime and sleep cycle, good quality sleep, eating healthy food at regular intervals throughout the day, making sure your digestive system is healthy, and practicing good, deep breathing throughout the day and drinking enough water. If you’re not sleeping it’s going to be really hard to refill your energy bucket and have enough energy leftover each day for your libido - so get help to figure out what it’s going to take to get you sleeping well.
OK so first we plugged energy leaks - now the SECOND is to refill that energy bucket.
Rest is important - getting enough hours of good sleep every night for sure
Eating nourishing food regularly each day and keeping your digestive system healthy is really important
Deep breathing every day is important.
So the basic ways you make energy - rest, you get energy from the food you eat and you get energy from the air you breathe.
In addition to this basics is superfoods!! Libido enhancing recipes, superfoods, and acupuncture can help as well.
Recipes that boost libido contain pungent spicy foods like garlic, onions, chives, cinnamon, ginger, peppers, coriander, and cardamom. These are herbs that enhances your libido and spices. Arginine rich foods like eggs and meat plus nuts and seeds. Shellfish like oysters, clams, mussels shrimp and scallops are rich in zinc which also essential for making hormones. Nuts like walnuts, almonds, chestnuts plus sesame and hemp seeds in particular strengthen the sexual energy.
My Favorite superfood - fresh ground flax seeds. These are amazing! 2T/day contains lignins - a phytoestrogen that protects women from heart diseases, bone loss, and vaginal dryness and helps maintain a healthy ratio of testosterone to its bound cousin DHT... Oats can help free up bound testosterone raising your active testosterone levels, which is great for libido. Daikon radish good for stimulating a waning libido in men and women! And rose petal tea is known to be helpful as well.
So do all this at home right now!! The right foods - The right superfoods - and the right lifestyle are absolutely going to increase your libido! And if you still need more help consider herbs - here’s how they work.
There are herbs specifically to restore your energy reserves. These are what are called - JING or essence or kidney tonics in chinese herbalism...And if herbs were an easy, one-size-fits-all thing I would absolutely tell you right here and now which ones to use - but it doesn’t work that way - here’s why.
You can get herbs that strengthen your Yin - cool, watery essence - or your Yang - warm fiery essence - and you really want to have equal amounts of both. So some people might have plenty of yang but not enough yin - they want to take 80% yin essence tonics and just 20% yang - but other people might have opposite lots of yin but not enough yang - and they want to take 80% Yang essence tonics and 20% Yin essence tonics.
People who have even amounts of Yin and Yang but need more of both can take a 50/50 blend.
In addition - as you start quickly adding more energy into your system - it’s important that your energy is circulating freely. If your energy is stuck somewhere - when you add a lot more energy to the system - you can get a big energy traffic jam at the place where it’s stuck. I always say you want to build your energy - move your energy - build then move, build then move - in steps - until you reach a certain critical level where your energy is so strong it’s going to move on its own no matter what!
A good herbalist will make sure to mix in herbs to your yin and yang to help move your energy as it gets stronger if this is an issue for you -
Herbs are seriously powerful medicine - and you’ll get the best results by far using them when they’re customized for you -So consider having a couple of consults with a good tonic herbalist to get you started on a long term strengthening formula - check in about every 3 months at first then every 6 months later to fine tune your formula.
Bottom line - there are things you can do to majorly improve your libido naturally - Yayy!!
If you’re ready to get started - you can download a FREE COPY of my Menopausal Woman’s Roadmap that will walk you step by step through including the most important foods in your diet every day to help your body build and balance your hormones naturally before during and after menopause. It also comes with an invitation to my Free PRIVATE Facebook Group and FREE - hour long masterclass that I teach online - so I’m seriously ready to help you right now. Are you with me??
And remember you can watch this whole series of videos on my blog
with transcripts, downloads, extra notes, links and more - be sure to check it out on my blog - the link is in the comments below.
In the FIRST VIDEO we covered what vaginal dryness is - what its symptoms are - and how treat causes of vaginal dryness other than low estrogen.
In the SECOND VIDEO we covered how to boost your estrogen naturally during & after menopause with diet, lifestyle, and supplements, because low estrogen is the #1 cause of vaginal dryness.
In the THIRD VIDEO we talked all about what you can do externally to combat vaginal dryness - so the best and the worst lubes, moisturizers and topical hormones and the ingredients you most want to avoid using, so that you don’t disrupt your natural lubrication, or the delicate pH. or the balance of beneficial bacteria in your vaginal area… So how to take care of your most delicate tissues topically.
In the FOURTH VIDEO I have a super special treat - SEX EXPERT CLINICAL SEXOLOGIST JANE STECKBECK is joining us to share her vast experience - her best tips - and to answer your questions.
And in THIS VIDEO is on increasing libido- so were back up with a complete topic and of course I’m here to answer if you have more question.
I’m Dana Lavoie - Acupuncturist & Herbalist, and The Founder of Menopause Basics and thanks so much for joining me today and spending your valuable time with me - it means a huge amount to me. I’m always checking the comments below - and please be sure once you grab your free roadmap to share this video with a friend.
See you soon -Goodbye for now.
And I’ll see you soon…!